ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
