yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
