they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize