You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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