oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
home. puking in laundry basket.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Randomize