I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
