Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
