its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
