Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Randomize
