last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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