I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
that is very illegal...i love you.
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