It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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