His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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