She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
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