giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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