Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol http://tfl.nu/jhs1
  Replies (54) Good night (1673) Bad night (3360)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl... http://tfl.nu/69tn
  Replies (29) Good night (3135) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work http://tfl.nu/uouq
  Replies (16) Good night (956) Bad night (3897)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened... http://tfl.nu/apd0
  Replies (17) Good night (5950) Bad night (1168)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that. http://tfl.nu/r8dq
  Replies (22) Good night (1797) Bad night (5846)
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (204): Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend http://tfl.nu/gyj1
  Replies (22) Good night (1062) Bad night (2699)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented". http://tfl.nu/soll
  Replies (10) Good night (2074) Bad night (3422)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care. http://tfl.nu/9gbe
  Replies (6) Good night (2147) Bad night (1200)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it? http://tfl.nu/nm01
  Replies (2) Good night (2372) Bad night (969)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice. http://tfl.nu/09lg
  Replies (4) Good night (3412) Bad night (1095)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw http://tfl.nu/yk6h
  Replies (11) Good night (899) Bad night (1883)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him http://tfl.nu/nis3
  Replies (1) Good night (418) Bad night (1059)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck. http://tfl.nu/3nwx
  Replies (11) Good night (1768) Bad night (562)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.

  (1-703): View more from Virginia

  Give me weed or give me death?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane. (1-703): Give me weed or give me death? http://tfl.nu/f8a2
  Replies (3) Good night (911) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now http://tfl.nu/lg51
  Replies (1) Good night (319) Bad night (545)

Randomize