i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.