That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
