I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize