She went from zero to smokin in five shots
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
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