After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
