32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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