Even the bartender felt bad for me
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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