Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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