Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize