I hope mine doesn't look like that
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Randomize
