You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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