Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
