Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
