You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Randomize