they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
