People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I love you. Go after that dick
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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