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• (404): View more from Georgia

  I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high

  (954): View more from Florida

  Yeah, I don't like babies at all

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions

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• 

  25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (510): View more from California

  Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  Pencil dick carries the name proudly.

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• 

  These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (208): View more from Idaho

  Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...

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• (252): View more from North Carolina

  Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".

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