wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize