from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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