If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
My dick has a subreddit
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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