never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
