I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
