he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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