Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
