Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
