Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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