Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
It's shark week go big or go home
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.