His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
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