therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
this is an emotional support booty call
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
