Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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