they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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