I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
