I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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