Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize