Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
