There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.